Cove Adoptive Families Inc.

Christmas Party 2011

2011-12-04T19:03:00.001-05:00

CAF Christmas Party 2011 at the Somerset Children's AId Home

Therapeutic Horse Riding

2011-04-17T19:51:00.006-04:00

We had a wonderful time learning about the horses and then the kids got to go on their own horse rides! What a great event!

CAF Christmas Party 2010

2010-12-12T18:16:00.005-05:00

Cove Adoptive Families hosted a Christmas Party at the Somerset Children's Aid Home. We were so fortunate to have great support from our CAF families, friends, and other family members that we were able to sponsor all of the Children at the Children's Aid Home and all of the foster children they currently have. We made the rainy trip up to Somerset where we enjoyed pizza and some great homemade cookies from Tammie Dick. Chris Binduga provided us with a great craft and then we were able to give the kids all of their generously donated gifts. It was a very moving day for our family. We are so truly blessed.

C

October Newsletter

2010-10-19T07:38:00.006-04:00

Celebrate National Adoption Month

2010-10-15T09:43:00.001-04:00

J.B. Tree Farm

2010-10-10T20:06:00.004-04:00

NOVEMBER IS NATIONAL ADOPTION MONTH

2010-10-10T10:51:00.000-04:00

Adopt A Foster Child for Christmas

2010-10-07T18:58:00.000-04:00

See below for details on Christmas Program

More Carnival

2010-07-18T10:40:00.003-04:00

FREE Kids Carnival

2010-06-13T15:25:00.014-04:00

J

The Carnival was a HUGE success! We had a wonderful day and many smiles were seen!

WHEN: July 17th from 10:00-2:00

Where: Logan Town Centre-Parking Lot at Boscov's

Tons of Games, Prizes, Food, Drinks, Crafts, Bounce Houses, Lego building, Kids play area, Face Painting, Henne Tattoos, and much much moe!

Music by Paul Stevenson, Performance by Exelle Majorette & Dance Group, and a Special Performance by Chelsea and Stevie Moses from the Band EVK!!!

Visits from McGruff the Crime Dog, Handy the Clown, and Lumpy the Clown.

Also available will be representatives from various agencies who provide services to Families and Children! Learn about adoption, foster parenting, the foreign exchange program, counseling, Operation Our Town, Home Nursing Agency WIC Program, Blair Family Solutions, Blair County Conservation, Child Advocates of Blair County, etc.

Phone 814-224-2826
Email: coveadoptivefamilies@gmail.com
Website: www.coveadoptivefamilies.org

Week of the Young Child April 2010

2010-04-24T17:22:00.010-04:00

Sunshine The Movie

2010-03-12T20:36:00.003-05:00

www.sunshinethemovie.com

I had the opportunity to watch a documentary film called Sunshine. I was very moved by this documentary. This movie shows first hand how the world of adoption is growing and changing. Check it out!

In 1975 an unwed pregnant girl enters a home for unwed mothers to hide her pregnancy and give her baby up for adoption. Feeling that was just what you were to do in 1975 we see now years later how the daughter she gave up for adoption repeats history by herself becoming an unwed mother. But instead of hiding away in nunnery, she has the option of keeping her baby, and rather than being an unwed mother, she’s now referred to as a single mother. Along with that we see how now she is able to expand the traditional definition of family to include her birth mother and her extended family.

As part of CAF’s mission to advocate and educate to the world our love for children and adoption it’s so vital to hear stories like this. Here we see where a child is reunited with her birthmother. They are able to bond and develop a relationship. While we also see how two woman become mothers together in their own roles. One as the mom who raised the child, who feels all ownership to that child regardless of their genetic ties. Then we have one who is gracious to have been given the opportunity to know the baby she gave up at birth is ok and that the decision she made for her was a good one.

This story has so many positive points- a birthmother knew she couldn’t give her baby the life she wanted her to have at that time in her life so she chose another path for her but one that involved life. That birthmother then goes on to lead her life. She’s ok. You can give a baby up for adoption and that is ok. Then we see how a birth mom and her child can be reunited and it can be a healthy loving relationship. But we also see how single moms and single dads can make it too! Most importantly though, we see how a child who is adopted is ok. She’s healthy, she’s adjusted, she’s productive, she’s ok. Her adoptive family is a family. They love their daughter and she loves them. Adoption works!!

All too often we hear “ I don’t know if I could love a child that isn’t mine”. Or “What if they have problems?” or “what if the birthparents come around.” And to that I respond “she is mine.” The more we can make the world understand that genetics doesn’t make something yours the more we can end the suffering of children who are without the love of a family. And to “problems” I respond and if you have a child of your own birth they will be perfect? They will have no problems?? All children have “problems” that’s what makes us human beings! And if the birth mom comes around, well we’ll deal with that just like we deal with other family members!

Life is what we make of it. Go into it with a negative attitude waiting for negative things to happen and they will. Go into it with faith and a positive attitude knowing you can change the world and make it a better place and you will make it a better place, one adoptive child at a time!!

2009 CAF Christmas Party

2009-12-14T21:32:00.005-05:00

What a great night! The party was fantastic. Greg and Kathy have a beautiful home and they were generous enough to open their home to us and host a great Christmas Gathering! Santa even knew where to come! He brought something for every little one! We had face painting, tons of great food, and just a great time socializing with one another. I couldn't have imagined a better night! Merry Christmas to you all!!

Our One Year Anniversary is almost here!

2009-11-04T18:41:00.002-05:00

Happy Anniversary!!

As I look back over the past year I have many emotions to share. I’ve been excited and overwhelmed, I’ve been sad and I’ve been happy. I’ve even been frustrated. But, I have also at times been in total disbelief that this is happening.

This month marks the one year anniversary of COVE ADOPTIVE FAMILIES!!! It’s hard for me to put into words how much emotion comes with even just typing this! It all started with an idea I had for some of us adoptive families to get together… and now look. Just in one year we have grown from an idea to a corporation that is waiting for non-profit status approval. We have 25 members. Some of which who just enjoy the emails and informational updates and some who have been so vital in the growth of CAF that I would never have been able to make it the success it is without them. But whatever your role, whatever your involvement with Cove Adoptive Families, it is special and it is appreciated.

We've also had a lot of family and friends support. I can't talk about the success of CAF without mentioning the support of my husband and my friends. So thank you all for your support. And also the outpouring of support we have and still are receiving from our community agencies. I have truly been blessed this year by so many people. It's just been amazing!

We’ve gone from just a few of us socializing with one another to making a stand in our community advocating and educating about adoption. We’re embarking on new fundraising projects, we’ve added several new children this past year and I am hoping we add even more next year!!!

This group has become something that warms my heart and brings a smile to my face. It has grown into something that I never expected. It has become a mission and a vision for our family and hopefully for yours too. We have made some great friends and awesome connections for our families. I am excited to continue our relationships and to grow with all of you.

I just wanted to thank each and every one of you for your awesome contribution to making COVE ADOPTIVE FAMILIES a true success. I can only imagine if we did this much in just one year what will our second year bring!!

So please join me as we embark on a brand new journey towards 2010!!! Thanks to all of you!! And Happy Anniversary!!

Holly

CAF goes down on the Farm. J.B. Tree Farm that is...

2009-10-25T21:05:00.005-04:00

J.B Tree Farm was an awesome time! We enjoyed a cook-out together then we took a hay ride around the Farm. Then we got lost in the corn maze! The kids also enjoyed playing on the pile of hay bails! It was a beautiful day shared among friends and family.

CAF Visits the Southern Cove Volunteer Fire and EMS Station

2009-09-27T09:27:00.006-04:00

We all had a great time touring the Fire Station. The fire fighters and EMT's were awesome. They let the kids climb all through their the trucks and the ambulance. They taught them fire safety. They could not have been more great to us. And of course there were hats and coloring books for them all! What a great day.

My Thoughts on Family

2009-08-28T17:48:00.001-04:00

A family is defined in many ways.

The dictionary defines a family as a group of individuals living under one roof and usually under one head of the household or a group of persons of common ancestry.

I define family as this. Family is not about genetics. It is about loving each other through the great times and also through the tough times. Through the pain and sorrows and through the joys and laughs. Through the births and through the deaths. Through the struggles and the triumphs of each other. Family is about not judging one another but about accepting one another. Family is about hugs and cuddles, kisses and smiles. Family is about fights and tears. Families don’t always agree but they always love. Through it all a family is the place where you will find safety, security, and peace.

Family is not only the physical place of a house it is the place in your heart where you feel that warm feeling, The place where you can smell those familiar smells and hear those familiar humms. The place where you can close your eyes and remember. Remember the scrapes of your first bike accident. Remember the fears of the dark, remember the laughs of the birthday parties. The place where you can smell the turkey cooking, where you can taste the potato salad and feel the sun on your face from the porch, the place where you can hear the trees rustle or the horns blow. Whatever your place… where ever that is and whoever it is with… when you find this place you will know that you have found your home and found your family.

Mom's Night Out

2009-08-16T14:32:00.003-04:00

Mom's Night proved again to be a great time!! We enjoyed some great stories and made some new friends. I am looking forward to next months gathering! We will be taking a road trip to the Southern Cove Volunteer Fire and EMS Comp nay in New Enterprise!! I think the kids will really enjoy this!! Date to be announced soon!

Also, the forms to become a Non-Profit Organization have been filed so please pray that everything goes through and is approved!!

CAF Pool Party

2009-07-19T11:13:00.009-04:00

It's hard to describe in words how awesome yesterday was. We got to meet some new families and get to know some more even better. Stories and advice were shared. Lots of laughs and great food were also shared. Missy the cookies were awesome! and I know you all enjoyed the burnt marshmallows (Josh), but none us could get over the brochette from Tammy! She is one special lady. The kids always amaze me and just to hear every ones stories always touches my heart. This experience is so rewarding. Thank you all for coming and for making it such a great day. I look forward to the next event!! I hope you all had as great of time as we did!

ADOPTION EXPO A GREAT SUCCESS

2009-05-10T09:11:00.007-04:00

We were extremely pleased with the success of the Adoption Expo. We had a nice crowd of families very interested in adoption and foster care. We got the chance to meet a bunch of great people and listen to some very interesting stories. I look forward seeing many of you again.

Thank you so much to Kids Peace, Arrow, SWAN, Blair CYS, and Blair Family Solutions for their support. Also Pastor Evie and the Jaggard United Methodist Church. What a great location for our event. It could not have been a better day. But it couldn't have been done without the help of all of you donating door prizes, supplies, and your time and hearts, especially Chris Binduga. Thank you Chris for all your help. Something like this can't be done without the help of others. We really made a difference today and I thank you all for that!! Happy Mother's Day!

My Thoughts on Mother's Day

2009-04-19T09:58:00.001-04:00

The Definition of a Mother:

As we head towards Mother’s Day, I decided to look up the definition of Mother in the dictionary and I have to say I was pretty irritated by what it said. It reads that a Mother is “anyone who has bore a child”. Sure that’s one way to become a mother, but to me there is so much more that makes a woman a mother. My definition of a Mother would be the one who raises, loves, cares for, teaches, comforts, and guides a child through their life. Mother to me is the one who provides the safety and security in their child’s heart that makes them know that no matter what they are loved and they will always have a place to call home, a shoulder to cry on, and arms to be held in. Mother’s provide love. We provide a safe place for our children. To me, that’s what makes a person a mother.

So with Mother’s Day right around the corner I was thinking tonight about the many emotions this day brings with it. Among others, there is joy, sorrow, and sometimes even anger and frustration.

Joy to me is of course the overwhelming happiness and joy you feel when you become a mother. Whether it is when the pregnancy test reads positive, when you hold your child or baby in your arms for the first time, when they first say mom or dad, or when they look at you and you can just see in their eyes that they feel safe. The joys of being a mom are endless.

But the sorrows too can be endless. Mother’s Day can be very difficult for many women. For those that are anxiously awaiting their chance to be a mother, for those who are mother’s but their precious gifts are with God, for those birthmother’s who hearts and minds wonder how their sons and daughters are doing, for those Mothers and Grandmother’s who have left this world. It seems there can be as much endless sorrow as joy associated with this day.

Anger and frustration are emotions most probably don’t think of as being associated with Mothers Day but for some children who’s first experience with a mother was painful anger may be there, and for some awaiting moms you too may have some days when you feel anger and frustration. Anger is a natural emotion we all face. It comes easy but it doesn’t always leave so easily. Don’t let that anger be your emotion for too long. Don’t let it have too much of your time or too much of your heart and soul. I believe that those who have the strong desire in their heart to be a mother will be a mother. I believe God would not give you this gift if it wasn’t meant to be fulfilled. And I hope and pray that those innocent children hurt by others will find the safety and security of a family and overcome those hurtful times.

This day is one that you may have a different reaction to based on your own circumstances. But whatever your emotions take a moment to remember your mother, or other mother’s you admire, maybe a birthmother, a grandmother, or maybe even a person who wasn’t your mother but that was a great influence on you. Mother’s Day to me is to honor all those women are devoted to making the lives of our children better. So for that I thank them and I thank you. I hope you all have a wonderful Mother’s Day.

Egg Hunt

2009-04-11T11:20:00.009-04:00

We enjoyed an Egg Hunt at Morrison's Cove Memorial Park. A big thank you to all my volunteers for helping with the hunt and hiding all those eggs!! We all had a great time.

Also a HUGE thank you to Wendy from Arrow Child & Family Ministries for helping out and for donating such awesome prizes to our community and the kids. Thank you so much!!

I hope you all have a wonderful Easter holiday.

Binduga's House

2009-03-28T21:18:00.005-04:00

Thank you so much to Chris and the Binduga family for opening up their home to us and for providing such a great afternoon of fun. The kids enjoyed cookie making, planting their own seeds, and crafts. While the moms and dads got to socialize and plan for future events. A very nice afternoon!

CAF Group Picture!

2009-03-28T21:16:00.001-04:00

What a great bunch of kids!

Jake got glasses!

2009-03-27T17:33:00.001-04:00

He looks 15!!!!!!!!!! Mind you he is only 9!! We think he looks pretty handsome!!

Three !!!

2009-03-08T21:27:00.007-04:00

It's hard to believe it but Araya is almost 3! We celebrated her birthday on Saturday with a house full of friends and family. I was once again reminded how truly blessed our family is. Thank you so much to everyone who shared this special day with us.

Mom's Night Out

2009-03-01T15:11:00.002-05:00

Just to give an update on "The Mom's Night Out" on Friday Night:

It's hard to put into words what a truly amazing experience Friday evening was. We talked, we laughed, and we even shared some tears until 11:00pm. We thought for sure the Olive Garden would kick us out! It was an evening I will always remember. The stories, resources, experiences, and support we have to offer one another is proving to be unmeasurable.

It is so wonderful to have other adoptive families to share my mine and my families life with. I just wanted to thank all those who were able to come and I look forward to the next time.

Words from Adoptive Families Magazine

2009-02-22T14:38:00.003-05:00

Below are some excerpts from the February Issue of Adoptive Families Magazine. I thought it was interesting to read what AF is saying about adoption support groups.

AF Says:
One of the happy surprises of adoptive parenting is the friendship and camaraderie to be found in adoption support groups. While friends and family don’t always understand the joys and challenges of raising children whose ethnicity, special needs, or personal histories may set them apart, support groups can provide information, companionship, and enrichment that you won’t find elsewhere.

What can a support group do for me?
* Emotional Support and Guidance in person, on line, or on the telephone.
* Newsletter highlighting local issues and activities.
* Adoptchats featuring living-room dialogue with other parents and professionals.
* Educational Workshops on topics for prospective and experienced adoptive parents.
* Information and Referrals regarding agencies, attorneys, one-on-one support, and more.
* Social Activities to promote friendships, connections, and fun.

The Importance of Support
Almost every adult adoptee I have talked to who was not involved in a group with his or her family has mourned this fact. Almost everyone has said, “When I was growing up, I wish I had known other kids who were adopted just like me. I had no one to empathize with what I was going through.

For more follow the link on the blog to AF Magazine.

Hope to see many of you Friday evening at the Olive Garden.
Holly

Celebrating Black History Month

2009-02-15T20:22:00.002-05:00

With adoption there is often the combination of your child's culture with the heritage or race of your own. I assume not all families choose to celebrate their child's culture or race but we do. In my opinion I do think it is important to educate yourselves and your children about their heritage. Thus this month our family will recognize and celebrate Black History Month.

I wanted to share a few things I found to share with my family.

The story of Black History Month begins with historian Carter G. Woodson. Woodson was passionate about black history. His passion, however, evolved in the most unlikely place. While working at a coal mine when he was twenty, the daily conversation of the black Civil War veterans often focused on interesting historical facts not recorded in history books. Woodson realized that despite the constantly evolving history of the African American experience, documentation was sparse.

In 1926, Woodson finally came across an idea that would forever associate his name with Black History Month. Negro History Week, as it was called by the black fraternity Omega Psi Phi, was a week in February dedicated to celebrating the achievements of blacks. Their celebration was somewhat stagnant until Woodson offered to put the Association’s name behind the idea in February 1926. Woodson chose the second week in February because it marked the birthdays of Abraham Lincoln and Frederick Douglass. Through Woodson’s promotion of the celebration in the Journal of Negro History and the creation and distribution of kits for children, Negro History Week gained in popularity. In 1976, it evolved into Black History Month.

•1863: President Lincoln issues the Emancipation Proclamation, declaring "that all persons held as slaves" within the Confederate states "are, and henceforward shall be free."
•1865, June 19:Slavery in the United States finally ends when 250,000 slaves in Texas are informed that the Civil War had ended two months earlier.
•1865, December 6: The 13th Amendment to the Constitution is ratified,
prohibiting slavery
•1870, February 3: The 15th Amendment was passed, granting blacks the right to vote.
•1964, July 2: President Johnson signs the Civil Rights Act, the most sweeping civil rights legislation since Reconstruction. It prohibits discrimination of all kinds based on race, color, religion, or national origin.
•1968, April 4: Martin Luther King, Jr., is assassinated in Memphis, TN.
•1968, April 11: President Johnson signs the Civil Rights Act of 1968.

I hope you too may choose to learn more about your childrens culture and share it with them, your family, and others.

God’s Glory has been revealed

2009-02-10T19:59:00.002-05:00

I have wonderful news to share with everyone tonight!!

Last evening God’s glory was once again revealed to us. Our dear friend Kylee Grabill received word last evening that her cancer is GONE! She had a test last week (PET SCAN) and the results came yesterday that her body shows no trace of cancer. Her doctor said he has never seen this before. He expected some shrinkage of the cancer and some improvement but he was not expecting it to be gone.

Of course we all were, but it has still been overwhelming to hear those words!!

I wanted to share this with all of you so that you may not only share in our joy but so that you may also see that God’s healing power is real and it continues. This is a true miracle and you have been a part of it. Thank you for your prayers for Kylee. We will continue to pray for her as she finishes out her chemotherapy and begins to prepare for her wedding and the rest of her life.

4 YEAR OLD’S ARE MUCH SMARTER THAN SOME ADULTS!

2009-02-06T20:54:00.004-05:00

Something Griffin said the other day has really been sticking in my mind so I thought I would share it with everyone. Paul was putting lotion on his dry skin and Griffin looked at his arm and said to Paul, “my skin is white and my sisters’ is black.” Paul responded with a “yes it is”. Paul’s not one for a lot of words but I don’t think he could of responded any better than that. There wasn’t anything else to say. That summed it up. Yes her skin is black and yours is white.

That of course is not a bombshell to us or anyone who has seen Araya and Griffin. But I have been thinking how those small words coming out of such a tiny little innocent mouth are so powerful. He had no questions about their skin. He was just making an observation that his skin was one color and hers was another color but in that same comment he was saying she is my sister, we are family, we are the same.

I guess my point is…why is that a 4 year old can understand that, but so many adults can not. I’m certainly no expert on diversity. I was born and raised in the cove. I wasn’t exposed to much diversity but I have just always been a.. well I will call it "a different thinker”. I never had a lot of the same feelings some in my family or perhaps others in the community used to have. I never really understood what different meant. Who wrote this definition of different anyway? Am I the different one? or is an African American different? or is a Canadian different? Who exactly is the different one and who is the normal one. Who set the standard that everyone who isn’t that one person is the different one?? I could never figure that one out. Who was this person then who wasn’t the different one? It never made sense to me that because someone has an accent or a skin color other than mine, or eyes that looks different than mine that they are “different”. Wouldn’t I then be different from them too! If so then doesn’t that actually make us the same?? I guess I just don’t like the word different. The things that make us who we are are exactly that. They are who we are. They shouldn’t be termed different they are just who we are.

Anyway, I could not be prouder of my 4 year old for knowing that he and Araya are not different. They are absolutely the same. They are God’s children and they are brother and sister.

(Oh and I must note I use Canadian as my example because it came first to mind since that is part of Paul's heritage.) That's for you Aunt Mary Ann and Aunt Pauline :)

Cove Adoptive Families Hits the Ice!! (thankfully not literally!)

2009-01-25T09:07:00.012-05:00

The group joined at Galactic Ice in Altoona to enjoy some skating together. Then we headed to CiCi's Pizza for some lunch. A great time was had by all. Thank you to everyone for coming out. See you all soon!!!

Zach and dad Stephen take the first lap!

Now mom Brenda gets a turn on the ice.

The Binduga boys (Bret & Josh) ruled the ice!!

Lainie and dad Brad take a break from the ice.

We all managed to stay upright!

Griffin wanted to race Sierra! He's pretty silly.

This was about all Araya could take of the ice. Maybe next time!

Kylee Grabill Blood Drive

2009-01-25T08:55:00.007-05:00

Kylee Grabill, 20, (in the purple) was diagnosed in fall 2008 with anaplastic large
cell lymphoma. As a very important part of her treatment at West
Penn Hospital in Pittsburgh, she has been receiving transfusions of
red blood cells and platelets.

A graduate of Central High School and Pruonto's Hair Design Institute,
Kylee has been working at Holiday Hair. She and her fiancé,
Zack Sowel, are planning their May wedding. Kylee is the daughter
of Tonia and Steve, and the sister of Jalynne and Steve. Her
father, Steve, is well-known in the community for his quality work at
Steve Grabill & Son Construction Company. Tonia is the Proud owner and works at Caterpillar Clubhouse Day Care. The family are very active members of
Faith Assembly of God Church in Roaring Spring. This special
blood drive is being held at the Church Youth Center in town.
Kylee’s friends and family encourage the community to donate
blood in her honor, in support of her journey back to health and to
replenish the blood supply from which Kylee, and other patients
like her, are using.

Central Blood Bank is the not-for-profit organization that supplies
the blood and blood products to more than 40 hospitals in western
Pennsylvania, northern West Virginia, and eastern Ohio.

Kylee Grabill
Replenishment Blood Drive
Monday, February 16, 2009
1:00 pm to 7:00 pm
Faith Assembly of
God Youth Center
To schedule your lifesaving
appointment, please log on to www.centralbloodbank.org
and enter sponsor code
ZRTN0462 or George Hollenbeck
at 412-209-7100 or
ghollenbeck@itxm.org

Hair

2009-01-25T08:48:00.002-05:00

I'm starting to get pretty brave with Araya's hair. I'm not real good with hair anyway and hers is a little challenging. Last weekend we combed it out and did some braids. I am good with the products she needs and with caring for her hair but I'm not real great at styling so I was pretty proud of this "do"!

The twins play Dress-Up

2009-01-25T08:44:00.003-05:00

These are bribery shots for Griffin's Teenage days!!

Steeler's Fan

2009-01-25T08:38:00.003-05:00

Check out this little Steeler Fan!!!!

Open Adoption

2009-01-13T20:53:00.004-05:00

Paul and I have an OPEN ADOPTION. Our contact is through our agencies social workers but it is open. So with that being said, I was thinking tonight about Araya’s birthmother. We haven’t heard from her in a little more than a year now. She was very faithful about contacting our agency for photos or updates, which I was more than glad to share with her. I enjoyed updating her on how well Araya is doing and I enjoyed sharing with her the photos of her growing and bonding with her brothers. But, then it stopped. Just like that I heard no more from her. No letters, no calls, nothing. I feel sad inside for that. I pray for her and I pray that she is ok. All of her indications to us were that she enjoyed the photos and she planned on keeping in contact with us. She enjoyed seeing how well Araya was doing and it made her feel good to know Araya was healthy and getting the family she wanted her to have.

At first I tried very hard to understand those feelings she shared. I remember when I first started sending her pictures I was so nervous. I would look at the photos and I almost felt like I was bragging. What I mean by that was I felt bad. I felt guilty sending her these pictures of my beautiful happy daughter. I was sending her holiday, birthday, trick or treating, football games, etc. All these wonderful family photos of us and I would send them to her and there she was alone. So yes, I felt very guilty and I felt like I was shoving my happiness in her face but then she sent us a letter. She sent us a letter explaining how wonderful it was for her to see Araya happy. To see her getting all of the love and the things she knew she could not provide for her. She wanted us to know how important it was to her that we know that seeing those pictures actually gave her peace. I remember thinking if I were her and I saw those pictures of that beautiful little girl I would want her to be with me. I would want to be taking her trick or treating. I would want to be opening birthday presents with her. But then I realized that was how I felt not how her birthmother felt and those feelings were there because I can provide those things. Those feelings were there because Araya is my daughter and I could not imagine a moment without her in my life.

I learned from Araya’s birthmother when she explained how seeing Araya happy and adjusted with her family made her feel happy. She needed to know that Araya was healthy and that her decision was the right one for Araya. I learned that the guilt and anxiety I felt was not needed. There was no reason to feel guilt over becoming a family. After all that is what we are and that is what she wanted for Araya. So those guilty feelings were lifted from me. I never again doubted what I sent. I suppose for me, her letter completed a chapter in our families adoption story. We made her a photo album last Christmas with many captions and photos from the year. But that photo album was the last time we heard from her. Since then there has been nothing. I contacted the agency not too long ago to see if they had heard anything but they hadn’t. So all I can do is hope she is well. Perhaps she received the closer she needed. Perhaps we will hear from her again perhaps we won’t. Whatever her path I just hope she is well.

Happy New Year

2009-01-07T20:07:00.002-05:00

It's hard to believe that another year has passed us by. As I look back over my year I am overwhelmed to have so many blessings. I have my wonderful family, many loving friends, a rewarding job, and my health. I just want to give thanks to God and all my friends and family for being a part of my year. I am looking forward to 2009 and starting new friendships with the adoptive families I have met. I hope that we can learn from one another and share our stories of adoption and parenthood with each other. I have much to learn and much to share and I look forward to doing it with other adoptive families and their children.

More Christmas 2008

2008-12-28T18:07:00.007-05:00

Here's Christmas Eve at our house.
Jake and Araya helped me bake some cookies

.

Then we opened 1 gift before we got ready for Santa to arrive.

Then Christmas Morning we awoke to find this:

Araya was already painting her nails with her polish. She loves make-up! What a girl.

Here's photos from the Keller Family Christmas at John and Shelley's

TRADITIONS

2008-12-28T17:24:00.004-05:00

Traditions are so important to who we are. It can come in smells, sounds, tastes, photos, or even stories told. Whatever your memory of them, traditions are what makes us individuals. They are what make us continue to exist.

It occurred to me how much of an importance rests on the traditions of our lives because when the details of those events are changed they are no longer the same traditions and we are no longer the same people. Once the details are changed a new tradition is born and as much as those new traditions have their own importance and their new set of memories so do the old ones then become the stories of the past are told at the new traditions. I guess that’s what makes memories but it made me a little sad inside to think of the traditions that have come to an end.

So let me share some of our holiday traditions with you all. Every Christmas we have an annual Christmas Party where we gather with friends at our house to share in a wonderful evening of food and fun. Santa always stops by and drops of a sack of present for the kids too!! This evening is one I always look forward too.

Then we have our own family Christmas Eve tradition where we open one gift that we got for each other. This is always a nice start to calm the kids down before we put out the carrots and cookies for Santa.

Then we have our Keller Family Christmas where we get together with Pauls’ family and exchange presents and eat! We take turns going to each others houses and this year we were in State College at Paul’s brothers house- Uncle John and Aunt Shelley's. We had a wonderful day watching the kids play and just spending time with each other. We even got to enjoy a snow ball fight!! Of course we ate too much but I think that is part of the tradition too!

One tradition that was put on hold this year was our annual gathering with the Grabill family. We always get together on an evening before Christmas so we can exchange our Christmas gifts with one another. This year we will do this tradition a little later because we are not having Christmas without Kylee. Some traditions are not made to change. Christmas with the Grabill’s is not Christmas without Kylee. It’s just a day and we can choose any day to all be together. So once Kylee comes home we will gather together to exchange our gifts and give thanks to God for the healing of Kylee.

Keller Christmas Party 2008

Hayden seems to be having a good time. The boys played DDR and the girls watched!

We had a very fun evening of good food and good friends.

WHY???

2008-12-27T22:22:00.011-05:00

Why do bad things happen to good people?

Have you ever heard anyone say this? I know I have many times and I have thought about it being true but I have never really thought about it as hard as I am tonight. This blog has been all about family for me and tonight my family is hurting. Tonight I am numb. Tonight I am faced with a tragedy. Christmas time is one of such love and joy but this year as we celebrated, as we opened presents, laughed with the kids and our families, ate tons of cookies and other holiday foods we did it but we did it with heavy hearts and wandering minds

We did it with heavy hearts and wandering minds because these pasts two weeks have been a blur. The reason is a very close friend of ours has been diagnosed with cancer. I say friend but as I have stated before, DNA doesn’t matter to me. She is a friend but to us Kylee is so much more. She is only 20 years old. She has not been sick. She is healthy and strong. How does this happen? I don’t know what to do other than pray and write so I can get some feelings out of my heart. I have been going through the motions of Christmas but now that the weekend is coming to a close I am beginning to feel the reality coming to the surface.

I now see that when cancer strikes you really don’t care why, you just want to know how to make it all go away. You just want to make the person better and see them get back to living their life the way they were. The why is no longer the concern but the cure certainly is. I have seen cancer many times. Paul's father was taken from him by leukemia before I knew him and being in healthcare I am not a stranger to what cancer is, but this is different. This time it is so much more personal. This time I find myself in a different role.

This time it is so much more painful and the feelings and questions are endless. We go from anger, to sobbing, to confidence, back to sobbing. It’s insane. I have never felt so many emotions all in one day. I have never prayed so hard or felt so close to God. There have been times through this experience when it felt like I was feeling Kylee’s pain. I trust in God and I know that he knows Kylee trusts in him. All I can do is pray. I do believe in the power of prayer. God has performed miracles and healed the sick and all I can do is ask that he do this for Kylee. I have been searching for some materials to give me strength and I found these quotes which I thought I would share. Also, I ask that if you would.. please remember Kylee in your prayers. Thank you.

Romans 5:3-5
Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; 4perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not disappoint us, because God has poured out his love into our hearts by the Holy Spirit, whom he has given us.

1 Peter 4:12-13,19
Dear friends, do not be surprised at the painful trial you are suffering, as though something strange were happening to you. But rejoice that you participate in the sufferings of Christ, so that you may be overjoyed when his glory is revealed... So then, those who suffer according to God's will should commit themselves to their faithful Creator and continue to do good

Exodus 23:25
"So you shall serve the Lord your God, and He will bless your bread and your water. And I will take sickness away from the midst of you."

Ky and Araya take a snooze on the beach this summer.

Christmas Prayer

2008-12-19T21:07:00.005-05:00

As I reflect upon Christmas and the true meaning behind this day I am reminded of the power of God. I have seen the miracles and wonders God can work. But I have also seen the pain and suffering faced by many. Today I am asking all of you to pray. Please take the time to stop, put down your wrapping paper, stop rolling the dough, turn the vacuum off, and pray.

Thank God for the many blessings you have. Whatever your blessings may be thank God for them, but also pray for those who are in need. Pray for those who are suffering, for those in pain, for those who may need our prayers more than we do this day. Pray for the sick, the hungry, the lonely. Pray for all of our bothers and sisters. Amen

December Gathering

2008-12-19T20:36:00.010-05:00

We had a nice time at the Christmas Gathering. The Heuston's and Barbee's joined us for the afternoon. I really enjoyed talking with you both and thank you for sharing your stories. The kids had fun coloring, playing Monopoly and running around. I am looking forward to the year ahead to be able to get together with each other on a regular basis.

Aaron enjoyed meeting some new friends.

Lainie, Jake, and Araya enjoyed coloring.

Things to be Thankful for:

2008-12-07T12:01:00.000-05:00

Here's some photos from Thanksgiving at Grandma Keller's.

The tradition of Thanksgiving is being carried on through the generations.

Uncle John carves the turkey. Jake and Jason helped mix the gravy.

Griffin and one of his girlfriends-Aunt Mary Ann. Aunt Pauline will be jealous!!!

Megan and Araya perform for everyone!! Grandma Keller and Grandma Reger look on with pride as the granddaughters dance around the living room.

When people say, "How could anyone give up such a beautiful baby?"

2008-12-07T11:34:00.000-05:00

I guess the first thing that comes to my mind is- well so if she was ugly would they have kept her??? But that’s just my smart mouth talking. I know they don’t mean it that way but it just sounds awful. I think or I hope that people really mean that as a compliment but what they don’t realize is that what I think about birthparents is that they must be the strongest people on earth. I would like to think that I could be that strong of a person but I don’t know that I would be. How selfless, how amazing must a mom be to carry a child for nine months. To bond with the baby inside you. To feel them kick, hiccup, stick their legs in your ribs, and shove their hands into your bladder. How amazing must a mom be to go through the horrible pains of labor to only find relief by the sudden push and second of release that your pain is over to only instead of receiving the reward of holding your child in your arms to let that child be given to the arms of another. How selfless is that? To recognize that you cannot provide for your child, to recognize that your child needs another and to be able to choose that for them. How amazing is that.

I cannot imagine the strength and will power it must take for a mother to stand by their decision that they can not be a mother to their child. I wonder if everything in nature tells that mother to hold their child. I wonder if at one point they have a moment where they feel strong and think they can do it. Do they have a moment where they feel no mater what somehow they will make it and they will be with their baby? Do they feel like running out of that hospital with their baby wrapped in a blanket. Maybe they do maybe they don’t. But whatever their struggle their ultimate decision leaves them walking away from their baby knowing that they have too, knowing that they can not be the mom their child needs. That decision, that selfless act of love can not come easy and no one should blame them or scold them. They deserve more that that.

Perhaps if people were more understanding of this decision there wouldn’t be the guilt these mothers feel. Maybe there wouldn’t be so many mothers out there trying to provide for their children when they know they can’t. Perhaps if our society was more open to the fact that just because someone is able to birth a child, that doesn’t mean they are able to raise that child, then just perhaps there wouldn’t be as many situations in homes where children are removed or neglected and even abused. Just perhaps…

People need to stop wondering how someone can “give up” a child and realize that they are not giving them up they are giving them life. Statements like those only hurt our children. They only label them in that category of less than a biological child because they were “given up’. I want my daughter to never feel as though she was “given up” because she wasn’t. She was given to her family. There is no “given up” in her life there is only a family who loves her and who will give her every opportunity she deserves and a birthmother who loved her so much that she gave her that opportunity to become a wonderful women. I am so thankful to Araya’s birth mother because without her I would not have Araya. People say all the time what a lucky little girl she is to have us but I say to them, NO, we are the lucky ones. To have been given this daughter. We are the lucky ones. I love Araya’s birth mother and I pray for her all the time and when Araya is older and able to understand her adoption I hope she too will pray for her birthmother. What a gift.

And even though birthmother’s don’t get the gift of walking out the hospital holding their babies the gift they do get is that of peace. The gift of knowing their child is loved, protected, secure, and taken care of. Their child has food, water, clothes, and a bed to sleep in. They get the gift of knowing their child will survive.

The strength I see in this little girl is also proof that she will survive. There is nothing in her that is ready to "give up"!!!

2008-12-05T21:00:00.000-05:00

Good photography, nice music. Beautiful family pictures .

Proof of Love Without DNA

2008-12-01T18:04:00.001-05:00

Recently we had family photos taken at our friend's the Grabill's house. They were having family photos taken too so the photographer asked if we wanted a group picture taken with both families. Thankfully we opted for a yes! This photo is proof that those who are not related can love one another. The Grabill family and our family became friends through a chance occurance only 8 years ago and since then they have grown to be an extended family of ours and our children. There is no DNA link here just love!!

When People Say, "I don’t know if I could love a child that isn’t mine."

2008-12-01T17:47:00.000-05:00

I was thinking the other day about people who have said about adoption that they don’t know whether they could love a child if it wasn’t their own. I used to get angry about that comment but now I think I understand it a little better, at least I am trying too. I think those comments are said out of fear and ignorance about adoption. At least I hope they are. I have just never been able to relate to that comment so I was trying to understand what would make a person think that. I was trying to figure out- why is biology so important? Having a biological tie to your child is so amazing and wonderful but not having one doesn’t make them any less amazing or make being their parent any less wonderful.

I wonder if maybe I can’t fully understand this feeling since I was blessed with the pregnancies of my boys. But, I always wanted to adopt. I just always knew it was something that I wanted to do. I never fully understood that feeling inside but I also think those are the things God has planned for us but just doesn’t tell us the whole plan all at once. It’s just something inside you that you feel and it just takes some time for the whole plan to work itself out. Anyway, to those of you who wonder if you could love a child that isn’t yours I will hold back from screaming at you that biology doesn’t make a child yours and I will instead tell you what I feel does make a child yours.

What I feel makes a child yours is the love you feel in your heart and soul for them. What makes a child yours is the feeling that you have that you would do anything for them. What makes a child yours is the pain and hurt you feel when they are hurt and the joy and happiness you feel when they are happy. What makes a child yours is the fear you feel inside that you will be a bad parent or somehow mess them up. What makes a child yours is the instinct you have to protect them from any harm or jump in front of a speeding car to sacrifice your life for theirs without even the second of a hesitation. A child becomes yours the moment you become their parent. For me this happened the instant I read the plus sign on those little home pregnancy tests. The moment I saw those plus signs, both times, I felt this enormous warmth of love and protection that I knew would only grow. The moment was then intensified when I heard my babies cry and the moments I held them in my arms. Those are the moments a parent never forgets.

The other moment that I will never forget was when we got that call. When we got that call from Lisa at the Children’s Home. When I first heard her name…Araya, when I first heard she was there waiting for us, I knew I loved her. Then when I saw her. When Karen opened that door and there she was. Karen was holding her and there she was just waiting for us, our daughter, our beautiful baby girl just there smiling and kicking. My love for her became even more intense and real. It’s just what you do when you become a parent. It doesn’t matter how, when, or, where but when God gives you a child you love them. The fact that I didn’t birth Araya made her no less of a child to me. She is mine. That’s what I will never get, they are yours. I guess I will never understand why just because someone does not have your DNA people feel they not “theirs”. They are!! At least for me they are. Let someone try and tell me or my daughter she isn’t mine. Hmm, well they can try but in that case I just might not be so understanding. My mom instinct may kick in a little too hard :)

So for anyone wondering whether they can love a child that isn’t theirs I challenge them to a few question. Do you love anything in your life? Do you have a friend you love? A husband, wife, boy or girlfriend? Have you felt an unconditional love for any of these people? If the answer is yes then guess what… you can love something that isn’t yours because you alreday do. None of these are “yours” based on DNA but you still love them. If you can love another human being then trust me, when those innocent eyes look into yours and call you mommy or daddy you will love them. The first time you see them smile or hear them cry you will love them. You will love them so much it will scare you!!! Being a parent is the scariest experience in the world but it is the most rewarding, spiritual experience on earth.

And for those that have tried and tried but cannot experience the miracle of pregnancy I pray you will experience the miracle of parenthood through adoption. I like to think that for some reason God has a special gift waiting for you and that one day you will be united with your little blessing.

Thanksgiving

2008-11-23T19:25:00.000-05:00

As we enter this week of Thanksgiving I find myself thinking about all of the things I have to be thankful for. I wonder if there will ever come a day when I am not absolutely amazed and touched by the things my children do. I must say 200 times a day how cute my kids are or how smart they are or tell my husband to look at what they are doing or what they are making. I am truly fascinated by them.

I know when they are first born you stare at them and you look at them in amazement. Every blink,every smile every wiggle of every toe brings a smile to a mother's face, but for me that amazement that adornment it hasn't lessened. I am still in disbelief over the blessings that I have in my children. I am so thankful and in such utter disbelief that God has blessed our family so abundantly. I sit all of the time and just look and them and thank God for these three miracles. Children to me, truly are the meaning of life. To me they bring things into perspective. They make so many other worries and stresses seem unimportant. In the faces of our children and in the things they do they just make life so rewarding and so meaningful. All three of them are so unique and so special. Jake the serious, shy, organized one, Griffin the silly, outgoing, creative one, and Araya the feisty, energetic, stubborn one. They can make you smile and cry in the same moment. They are what you would sacrifice your life for in a second, our children. For them I am thankful for.

My Thoughts on Foster Parents

2008-11-17T20:12:00.001-05:00

I have heard lot of people talk about Foster Care and Foster Parents. Some positive and some negative. Well I just wanted to share my thoughts on Foster Parenting. I think that the people who truly are foster parents are angels sent from God. Araya's foster mom and dad are the most wonderful people. They cared and loved her from the first 3 days of her life until she joined our family at 4 months old and as told by Karen, Arays'a foster mom those 4 months were not easy! Araya was a difficult baby. She had screaming fits, she had reflux, and she didn't sleep well, but through all that Karen could see the special little girl that lye in Araya's eyes. She knew that through that feisty little baby would stem a feisty little miracle. That miracle is our daughter, and without the love, devotion, and nurturing mother and father God blessed Araya with I would not have the secure stable child that I do today. Araya knew she was loved. She knew in Karen's arms things would be ok and she was safe.

I remember talking to Karen asking her "how could she do it?" "How can you give this precious little baby to another family?", I asked. and she answered me an answer that I will never forget. She said because that is not my role, I am not meant to be her mother, or her permanent family. I am only here to care for her until her real mother and permanent family finds her. (Yeah I know if you can read that without crying then bless you because every time I relive that conversation I cry.)

So for anyone out there skeptical of foster parents. I just wanted to share my thoughts on what angels they are. They are the people who are so selfless that they give of themselves weeks, days, or months of taking care of a child and those times may not be easy but they do it. They are that loving and that amazing that they give of themselves so much that these precious little miracles can be in a secure safe haven until they are united with their family. So I can't imagine a more greater deed of another human being than to give of themselves for the good of an innocent child.

As a matter of fact we bonded with Karen and Rich(Araya's foster dad) and their son Zach so instantly that I knew I always wanted them to be a part of Araya's life. I wanted them to always know the little girl they helped care for. i wanted them to watch her grow and be there for her. That is why we asked them to be Araya's Godmother and Godfather which they graciously accepted. They are wonderful, amazing people who I am forever grateful too for taking such good care of our daughter. She could not have been in better hands.

Foster parents at the Children's Home of Pittsburgh know their roles. They know their boundaries. Their role is to be a foster parent and care for their foster children until they are joined with their family. So I also commend The Children's Home of Pittsburgh on a wonderful program. If you haven't done so you should check out their website on my blog.

Haloween 2008

2008-11-11T18:47:00.001-05:00

There's all 3 of the Keller's ready to get some treats! We have Princess Belle, Iron Man, and #23 Northern Bedford's Full back and Line Backer for Team #2

Then there's the twins making their silly faces!!

Adoption Celebration November 9th, 2008

2008-11-10T18:39:00.000-05:00

The adoption celebration was a great success. I want to express a big thank you to all of the families and children who came out to celebrate with us. I was overwhelmed with emotion and joy. It was especially heartwarming to see the children playing with each other and making new friends. I think we all had a great time talking with each other and sharing our stories. Then many of the kids enjoyed skating and bowling at the park. We also got some TV exposure when WTAJ showed up. I had called them and asked if they could come take some pictures of the event but I had no idea they would do an interview. They did show a clip and explained the event on the 11:00PM Sunday news. I also plan on submitting a picture to the Herald for a follow up story on how the event went. I haven't picked my photo yet but I think there is one at the craft table that will work! Oh that's what else the kids enjoyed. Many made their own crafts to take home with them.

I also want to thank Lisa Richards from SWAN and her family for taking the time to come celebrate with us. I know many of you really learned a lot from Lisa and I hope SWAN may even help some children find the families they have been waiting for. Thank you Lisa!!!

And also a HUGE thank you to Sandra Drenning for helping me with the food and park rental! And then to my volunteers of the day Tonia Grabill, Jalynne Cooney, Mandi and Steve Cottle and my sister in law Kathy Delozier. With out all of you this celebration would not have been such a success. I thank you all for being so special and for touching the lives of others. Oh yeah and Thank you Paul! My husband Paul also deserves a huge thank you for putting up with my ideas and letting me spend time organizing this event and our support group. Thank you honey. I love you!!

Now let me share the photos I have. If anyone has any other photos please send them to me or post on the blog!

The Keller's

2008-11-07T18:56:00.000-05:00

About Cove Adoptive Families

2008-11-06T22:27:00.001-05:00

I know there are so many of us adoptive families out there in the Central PA Area and I would love for us to develop a support system where we can get together to support each other, become friends, educate one another, or just hang out and play! I'm hoping to get our group started this month and then maybe we can have a Christmas Party for the kids in December.

This can be a great place for us to share our adoption and parenting resources. Discuss difficult areas such as attachment disorder, racism, sibling adjustment, or any other challenges your family may face.

Also, please take the opportunity to tell us about your adoption stories and show us pictures of your family. You know how us mom's love to brag and show pictures of our children! What better way is there to educate those considering adoption than through the innocence in the eyes of our children. Let's show the world how rewarding and amazing adoption is!!

Welcome to My Blog!

2008-11-06T21:57:00.000-05:00

Ok here it goes! I have no idea how to blog so I am going to give it a try. I'll take any advice any of you pro-bloggers can give a newby!